At the end of May, I had the good fortune to be able to go back to Arizona. My main reason for going was to attend my brother’s wedding. I was to leave right after work on a Friday afternoon; I get off work at 3 o’clock. As the days tip-toed closer and closer to
Friday, I found myself exceedingly joyful. I could not wait to see my family and friends that I had left only a year and a half earlier. It seemed like an eternity had passed since the time of my departure. When the day finally arrived, I was full of energy like a Mexican jumping bean.
I was going for the wedding on Sunday evening but, I could not wait to get to church on Sunday morning. You see at church, the people not the building, I found love and total acceptance. At church, I found hopeful expectation and indeed, the fruition of a predestined appointment between me and the Holy Spirit. The atmosphere in this place is like nowhere else I have ever been before! At church, there is always a purpose for my life and a place for me. I was like Norm in the show “Cheers”…lol. Everyone knew my name! More than that, they knew me and I knew them. I was seeing the people but remembering the stories of the times we spent together on snow trips, horseback riding or helping someone move. It was hard to leave and I can’t wait to visit again.
As I reflect on this past weekend, I know that I have some wonderful take-aways. I learned some things that I must put in my pocket and take with me as I am living here now in Los Angeles. I felt so alive and so at peace there. It dawned on me that there was a purpose in everything when I lived in Arizona…a purpose in fellowship, a purpose in giving, a purpose in simply being where I was at any given moment. I sought the purpose in all things. Here, as I float about my life, trying to keep my head above water…and seeking pleasure, upon pleasure as a relief from the monotony, it occurs to me that it’s ALL MONOTONY and routine behavior to attempt an escape from the hum-drum life. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family and I am so glad and grateful to be closer to them and spend time with them because the time is so precious. However, I have a need for something more.
I think the ‘something more’ that is necessary, is the pursuit of passion in my purpose which is directly opposing the pursuit of passion in pleasure. The more time I spend on focusing on grooming my pleasures, like, getting male attention or happy hour to relieve stress from constant traffic and the hectic work-week, the less time I spend thinking about my gifts and sharing them with others as I am given the opportunity. Purpose. It may be to serve someone with a pure heart at my job, it may be to lead a small group study or to volunteer to assist children with special needs. I do think it’s very ironic that the first permanent job I have gotten in over a year of being here is…at a church. I am starting to realize how disconnected I have been from the church, the people but, also from my purpose in general. I am going to make a list of things that I would like to do that give me the opportunity to explore my purpose in this city, my purpose at my job and my purpose in the local church and the church at large. If you’ve been feeling like you are floating through your own life, I invite you to do the same. Let’s channel our passions in the direction that satisfies at the deepest part of who we are.